Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Congratulations Wayne

I say: oooh u has a gf and never told me
I say: bitch
Wayn says: i'm slowly leaking it out to people. the whole distance thing is a bit hard to explain to folks.
I say: not when i've been following the drama since the beginning
I say: pretty mad
I say: but i'm sure LOVE will prevail
Wayne: (though this just proves that NO ONE reads facebook profile relationship statuses)
I say: oh.

Monday, December 29, 2008


In my little emo moments. I think the lyrics say it all. Alanis Morrisette started out fantastic when she first broke out. Angsty women music were kinda big then and she had a great run. I really feel for herlah, her ex-fiance, Ryan Renolds went on to marry ScarletJo who looks like the poster girl for an anatomically perfect woman. She's kinda classier now too. I'd think it'd be so easy to slam them in a song.

I remember Sha telling me that there should be a line to segregate the lines between bestfriend and boyfriend. Was telling Jude how the quality of my conversations now has improved thanks to a certain person who has chosen to "play a role in my life."

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Looking back

Makes me wonder what transpired such conversation.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

CB FUCK!!!!!

!begin rant 

Who the fuck teach you lit review can omit reference one?! Am I supposed to telepathically know where your sources come from or search it out myself? Bladdy hell!!!!

Barry Manilow's rendition of Right Here Waiting sucks ass. Don't mess with the original! 

I heard Susanna and the Magical Orchestra's cover of Love Will Tear Us Apart on Fel's blog (Got to hand it to her for her great taste in music) It sounded so pretty. Then I heard Fall Out Boy's cover and the original. *cringe* It's like they took her Chanel dresses and recorded music out of shredding them to pieces. 

I need a new man whore. I have very short attention spans. Past applicants will not be considered. New ones will go through very stringent screening. Impress me with your best pole dance moves or if you can pick up my drinks tab without bankrupting yourself first. Mingers may not apply. 

!end rant

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Stuff that went through my head within the past 30 hours

I'm too nice for my own good. I told myself that I'd stop caring but I ended up recommending him for a job. Hearing his voice again. I felt something. The same feeling when I would overhear his voice over J's phone when he calls sometimes. This is sad and masochistic. I end up falling over and over again. The vortex of insanity - It has a tagline. It sucks. People caught in it are called suckers. Chocolate cake makes me happy. Yes indeed but greed is not good. There is such a thing called too much of a good thing. Sub the latest Soul Eater Episodes already MOFOs! Tossed and turned, couldn't sleep well. I wonder if he noticed. I want a holiday. I think i deserve one. It occurred to me this time two years ago, he proposed. Why am I still thinking of him. I am not in love. Not out. Still getting lucky, that's what is most importante. You might be really happy with what you're doing until someone tells you you're not. Then life begins to suck. And you realise that, its all about the money. Densha okoto was nice. Escapism and hyperreality. I love happy endings.  Secret santa headache. 

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

In conversation @ vurk

Lost in translation: At work with LS

Me to LS: Hey if we have lots of heavy stuff KS will have to be our beast of burden.

LS to KS: Eh KS tmr YOU'RE going to be our donkey cos we have to carry lots of heavy things. Please dress comfortably.

I *hearts* working with crazy ppl.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Cynical me

I'll always love you - what rubbish. Wait till I tell you Santa doesn't exist. Bwahahahahaha

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Recycled texts - As told to Sha

"Is short-termed happiness better than having no happiness at all?"

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Showing signs of recovery

For those of your who don't already know, I suffered an asthma attack last week. I guess the few days I took away from work, school still carried on. Time and tide waits for no man or woman. It was truly a shitty moment. I'm still swamped with work but I really thank the people in my lives who make it slightly ever so bearable. 

Friday, December 12, 2008

Have I mentioned I love my new job?

Format: Email

Sent to E CC: LS, 3.59PM

Dear E,
Since u have the biggest desk in our cosy new corner, you are required to allocate some space for us to contain our "hoards" which are not limited to the following:chocolates, biscuits, our growing collection of beverage sachets, instant noodles.
Since we are terrorists, and terrorist demands are seldom negotiable, we expect full cooperation.
Lots of hearts,

Your new neighbours

Format: Email

Sent to Soppy CC: LS, 4.06PM

Dear Soppy,
Oh terrorist-wannabe neighbours (Les Terribles),
That's a wonderful suggestion (demand). You have to ensure that your hostage (lovely me) is well-fed so that you will always have space for your growing food corner (hoard). :D

Format: Email

Sent to E CC: LS, 4.11PM

Ever so optimistic E. I confirm that your elephant tranquilisers are working great. And yes we treat hostages very well to comply with ISO (Infidels are So Overrated) standards.

Format: Email

Sent to Soppy CC: LS, 4.53PM

thanks for reminding me about the tranquilisers. need it bad now ... my head is throbbing. how about some medical aid for ze lovely hostage?

Format: Email

Sent to E CC: Soppy, 5.05PM

Soppy has jus gone off to pick up the ransom, so she regrettably is unable to attend to your request. in any case, hostages have to just bear with things until release (if at all). at least that's the case in my experience :-)


Heng didn't get lumped together with the diet bunch.

Monday, December 8, 2008

People more damaged than I am

(via sms) J: Too many issues, dunno where to start. Me thinks key solution, u should stop rebounding and heal your heart first. Cancer is still very much on your mind, FBC isn’t outwardly what you are willing to settle for and the Yardstick is another variable you shouldn’t be thinking about.

I’ve been dreaming about Cancer. Random things, when I’m awake I tell myself not to think of him and poof … gone. It doesn’t happen when I sleep. I dream of random things that I end up getting upset over and find myself waking up in shock more disgruntled than ever. I start to dread sleep that is not alcohol or drug induced. The dreams have stopped ever since things have progressed with FBC whom has been a nice distraction until now.

I hate it when I’m right about things. What is it with my choice in men? If there’s one thing I’ve learnt is that, despite the many promises, never try to change them. This one is the same as the predecessors, too many issues. I try to steer clear of them especially if it is dealing with fidelity or distance. I have abandonment issues especially after Cancer and all the single and not available men I’ve been dating.

The year-end is drawing near and I have this personal superstition of mine that it does not bode well for me if I spend it alone at home alone.

Yardstick: then i would have had a lot of bad luck over the years...

Me: But like i said, its a personal superstition.

Yardstick: i make my own luck :p

This pattern I’ve noticed over a span of 6 years so who can contest that huh? Don’t get me wrong, its not as if I’m scrambling to be a dick warmer of any sort. Thankfully I’ve not resorted to that sort of desperation.

I’ve had some nice invites for NYE, (thank ye Wayne and yes I am aware that IDR exchange rate is 8K to SGD $1, I super miss the guys down under and a 16 hour flight across the world is waay out of my budget) I’m really contemplating getting totally wasted although it’s a nice thought but I really don’t want to spend time making out with a random stranger. Beer googles and being alone has a knack of getting to you. What I really want is to be around the people who are important to me.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Fiction - inspired by friends

Philosophie says: (2:30:58 PM)

Give me a setting and occupation

wayne.rée says: (2:31:19 PM)

uh... why?

Philosophie says: (2:33:20 PM)

just give me one

wayne.rée says: (2:33:43 PM)

the desert and accountant

Philosophie says: (2:34:06 PM)

y accountant?

wayne.rée says: (2:34:29 PM)

because it's the last job you'd expect of someone in the desert

wayne.rée says: (2:34:35 PM)

is this some weird fiction exercise?

Philosophie says: (2:34:38 PM)


wayne.rée says: (2:35:35 PM)

thank yeh

Philosophie says: (2:36:33 PM)

the desert thing is so turn off-ish

Philosophie says: (2:36:40 PM)

coz i was thinking of something kinky

Philosophie says: (2:36:48 PM)

but she might get sand in her ...

Philosophie says: (2:37:10 PM)

and he might get abrasions

wayne.rée says: (2:37:19 PM)

so, essentially you just want to write an erotica and needed a main character and a setting. how is that even an exercise in fiction?! 

Philosophie says: (2:37:47 PM)

i'm flexing my creative muscles here

Philosophie says: (2:37:53 PM)

do not question my methodology

Philosophie says: (2:38:20 PM)

its going to be a porn script

wayne.rée says: (2:38:28 PM)

and yet you're not happy with the setting. see, you're just pretending to be exercising, when actually you're slacking off in a corner of a gym.

wayne.rée says: (2:38:55 PM)

oooooooooh, i wanna write a porn script!! i haven't done sex stories in years!! plus, if it gets made, i get my name on the credits!!

Philosophie says: (2:39:06 PM)


Philosophie says: (2:39:27 PM)

i'll slap u with a used rubber dildo from desker

wayne.rée says: (2:39:27 PM)

i was thinking of co-writing with you, but fiiiiiiine. be selfish.

He sat by the café window thinking about the soiree that had occurred the night before. His 3 shot espresso latte had hardly stirred him from the undead he was stirring into.

“At least I feel free. I am free,” he reassured himself. His thoughts shifted to Amanda the accountant. If that was even her name or profession, one could never be sure from a one-night stand.

They had met at a bar in the central business district. She was with some colleagues when he had chatted her up, she already had a drink in hand. It was an uninspiring cosmopolitan. If there was one thing he had picked up, girls with cosmos were definitely more agreeable. Strip her off her expensive vintage Chanel suit, what he saw was a lonely soul who resonates with too much Sex and the City.

Like a tiger on the prowl executed his moves. By the time she had downed her 7th cocktail for the night, she was begging him to take her home, allowed him to grope her in inappropriate places in full view of the public and skillfully taken off her knickers and placed them in his pants pocket.

Her apartment was sparsely furnished. The first thing that caught his eye in her zen inspired apartment was a 3 by 3 sandbox.

The body that encased in the suit that he peeled off was nothing short of amazing, he lapped her up like a mirage in a desert. (Insert 3 different sex positions in graphic detail - you may get as creative or kinky as you want here. I know y'all have filthy minds)

And that was the story of Amanda the accountant. 

All are welcome to provide input on the anti climatic ending, I'm down with a fever and bad throat, can't think of anything that inspiring in that department. So note away ... 

Monday, December 1, 2008

Happy endings

FlawedKnight® says: (9:33:37 PM)
woot you are in love!
Philosophie says: (9:33:45 PM)
FlawedKnight® says: (9:33:55 PM)
congrats lah
its about time
Philosophie says: (9:33:59 PM)
what makes you say that?
FlawedKnight® says: (9:34:04 PM)
your blog lah
Philosophie says: (9:35:00 PM)
i'll neither acknowledge or deny that
FlawedKnight® says: (9:35:08 PM)
FlawedKnight® says: (9:35:13 PM)
i'll take that as a silent yes
FlawedKnight® says: (9:35:20 PM)
grats! woot!
FlawedKnight® says: (9:35:24 PM)
love is in the air!
Philosophie says: (9:35:25 PM)
very silent
FlawedKnight® says: (9:35:25 PM)
FlawedKnight® says: (9:35:33 PM)
but still a yes, nonetheless

I told the FBC that its strange when I write about him. Honestly, I am extremely inspired by what he has to say because it always provokes an opinion not necessarily agreeable with his. The thing about this exchange is the debate that matters not the outcome. 

The thing about blogging is that what we share is something much too complex and real for the one dimensionalism of the written word. No happy endings here because in true Sophie's fashion, I never want happy to end.