Time as I know it.

It's a personal choice of mine to take my personal life offline at least uploading of information like blogging, fb status updates and twitter.

It took a really creepy guy who has managed to successfully google me through one email address and started off what seemed like a harmless conversation of common interests to stalking.

Oh and facebook is a huge breach of privacy. It's child's play for the common hacker and because of how much information it contains, it makes perfect bait for identity theft.

The web provides endless hours of time wasting activities. I still feed off my weekly Kdrama, I really like Cinderella's Sister which I'm following on a weekly basis the same time it airs in Korea, Japanese Manga and Anime.

I'm definitely plugging CS because it seems like it took all the streotypes of the ideal Korean woman and put it into the 2nd lead that makes her vulnerable, ideal yet dislikeable and irritating. The step-sister lead on the other hand is stubborn, manipulative, mean and yet pitiful.

Moon Guen Young is also a great actress by the way, her crying scenes are gut wrenchingly poignant.

Still on the Asian media feed, the media student in me has to commend the Hyundai Shouts of Reds (Shouting Campaign).

Le sigh. If only the rest of us has the balls to dump money on a campaign like this one for the upcoming big event that Singapore will be hosting later this year.

Let's see what they did right ...

1. Get the right sponsor on board.
No tight assed conservative, preferably has the mentality of a bloody rich sugar daddy.

2. Get the right people to endorse in this case Kim Yuna and Big Bang.
Kim Yuna became some kind of a national heroine after bagging a Gold medal at the Winter Olympics. Honestly I don't see Big Bang Fans running out to buy Hyundai cars after seeing the advert or any idol group at least to have the spending power having appeal to rather young demographic but this is mitigated by their popularity or what we call star power.

3. Synchronised dancing.
Mambo has never gone out of style. Think Michael Jackson's Thriller, one hit wonder Soldier Boy caused an internet sensation with crank Dat and most recently Wonder Girls with Nobody.

4. Appropriate use of social media tools.
With the combined powers of 1,2,3 launch a campaign to push out the content. Youtube is free and most importantly GLOBAL. Last I saw the vid had about 40k in views which is pretty decent.

I like how the World Cup influences practically the whole country, in this case, the Hyundai campaign is but one of the many campaigns floating around virally. The build-up and hype kinda makes you want to chant Dae Han Min Guk.

(How come we not like that one?)

i think i'm inherently evil.

Part of me has a masochistic streak that can sniff out weakness, incompetence and fear.

Was having a conversation with a stranger over social wholivesnearyou.

"Happiness is relative.
The higher the high, the deeper the drop.
But then again there's nothing modern medicine cannot fix."

"I think we live in a medicated society. I was referring to mood altering drugs like anti-depressants. You pop a pill and then suddenly don't feel like killing yourself. What rubbish. I believe in the power of the human mind. If you seriously need a pill to tell stop harming yourself I say you're better off dead cos you're just competing with me for oxygen."

C: I need a cause, I hate volunteer work.
Me: What about rehabilitation of whores back into society, you are already in the the RC. (C lives in Geylang - Singapore's red light district)
C: I hate you.

C: What's with that smug look?
Me: I just a mental high five with the little person in my head. SCORE!

Short thoughts

Haven't had any inspiration from the below mentioned challenge. My head's filled with graphic grossness thanks to Warren Ellis and Will's special mention of 2 girls in a cup to which I wiki-ed and decided that I would rather go blind and gorge my eyes out with a spoon than to partake in such a spectacle.

I sat up wide awake. Thinking of a suitable plot, as layered as kuih lapis (About the same time hunger pangs start to sink in) but to no avail. So I thought abt school and managed some constructive ideas abt the presentation. All is not lost. I'm quite exhausted today.

Short stop

By request I was asked/tasked/challenged to do something worthy of  a porn script. I will however think about it and with enough inspiration get to it as soon as i get a new muse. 

I'm making a personal resolution to make any moves on a guy and wait till he makes them. Just like its meant to be. Until then I will fill all my days with enriching healthy activities.

S tried to ring me but I didn't pick up his call. I didn't want to be dependent on him. At the back of my mind, I think its because I'm friends with his boss's wife. Karma is a bitch. Besides, it was good to know there are other people I can count on for support even if they're a 12 hour time difference away. 

The wingman got gf liao. My advise works better on others than it does myself. I should charge for therapy sessions. After which i use that money to seek therapy myself. 

My secondary schoolmate's micro blog about his coming bundle of joy here. It was always been a private joke for us that his kid would inherit 4 dimples from both parents. Talk about good genes. Their kids would probably be blessed with Mom's good looks and Dad's good brains (hopefully not his tiny eyes LOL). 

Reckonings

Mental meltdown. I could feel my heart race uncontrollably, my ears ringing and heat radiating from my face and palms. 38.7 degrees. After contemplating my existence I was much too exhausted. 

When 2 out of x of my best shags have decided to move to Europe and not come back, it doesn't become a statistic. It's a f@#$ing demographic.

I need a Euro trip. 

Flash back to Saturday.

It's strange how we seek comfort in someone else's misery. It was his birthday Saturday. Between sobriety and a smoke, I remembered telling K and she told me, you know my gf ended a 6 year relationship when she was 31.

"After that she went on a fucking binge and soon I started to remember the men in her life by their professions." 

I told her about how I felt about the Singapore dating scene and she said that its a generation thing. It's the 80s. 

I laughed. 

By her hypothesis, I would have to start dating guys who are at least 5 years older than I am or 7 years younger. 

Soapy tries scriptwriting for reality TV

Scene 486, Season 2: Enter bestfriend of main cast member, Sam into posh restaurant. Lighting is kept to a minimal almost like the Paris Hilton sex tape. She’s wearing a little tight electric blue dress with a matching expensive as hell handbag and stiletto heels. Her fake boobs look like they’re going to pop out of that sucka any moment yet she manages to jiggle daintily into a booth seat. 

She orders a bottle of sparkling water and lemon and checks her watch (product placement) and furrows her semi botox-ed brow. (It may or may not move depending on how recent botox was done)

Cue Jesse, tall hot tanned, sparkly light eyes with side swept perfectly blow dried hair. Walks no, saunters in. Slides into the booth seat with ease unlike Ms fake boobs.

He gives Sam a peck on the cheek. Sam looks visibly cheesed off.

Jess: Baby what’s wrong?

Sam: You’re late. Look, I’ve been here waiting for 2 full minutes for you. (Points at watch)

Jess: I’m not, I was parking the car. I told you to get out while I parked the car.

Sam: What ever. I’m hungry.

Jess proceeds to order his food.

Scene 487, Season 2:

Sam: Are you happy?

Jess: (While chomping on his food) Yeah.  What’s there not to be happy about?

Sam: I mean we’ve been seeing each other for about 5 months now. 

Jess: Yeah, its  been great. But I'm not ready for a relationship right now. I really want to but things have been so unsettled. 

Sam: (almost tearing) Yeah me too. 

Jess: By the way you remember my ex, Andi?

Sam: Yeah she was quite pretty. 

Jess: I don't think I'm over her. And she wants to get back together. I'm so CONFUSED.

Sam: I'm so drunk right now.

They start to make out.

**Soundtrack plays end credits roll. Voice over: Stay tuned for the next episode ...

The Hills with James Franco and Mila Kunis from James Franco

If I was queen of the world, there'd be no love songs, romantic novels or movies.

I caught Becoming Jane today, was rather tempted at channel switching, period dramas were never my thing even though I have great respect for Jane Austen as a writer but after a while her stories get a little blah, always between the dichotomy of social classes, likened the plots of modern day Korean dramas. And then what?

James McAvoy and his beautiful, baby blues.

“What value would there be in life if we are not together.”

Apparently lots. Had she eloped with Tom Lefroy, the man wouldn’t have gone to become who he became and she wouldn’t have devoted her life in writing. 

Watching the movie, the question of historical accuracies aside, I thought it gave a little insight to what type of person she was and how cold reality is. With that in mind, I do believe that genuinely they gave each other their hearts and love to last their lifetimes. 

Jane Austen never married. 

It is though, on the creepy side, to have her “ex” name his first born after her.

As seen

Facebook on my colleague's 25 things meme:

"I had a relationship that lasted nearly 7 years. Cruise control is a dangerous thing."

Somehow, I can so identify with this. 

Olive, Lizard theories and some other.

The olive theory (lifted from How I met Your Mother) propounds that while 1 half of a couple loves olives, the other hates them. Essentially, it's affirms how opposites attract. Parallel to the olive theory, WL and I came up with the lizard theory. He gave me a serious face when he said, "Do you know I'm scared of lizard?"

We both agreed that our future partners should not be afraid of lizards. 

As for my "list" I thought that it'd be nice to have if he reads at least 2 different newspapers a day and the Economist. There's something really sexy about a man who reads the paper. 

Crime and punishment

The blog's in a public domain, things that I want to leave for myself are usually written in some kind of a cryptic language.

“The guilty is he who meditates a crime; the punishment is his who lays the plot”

I replayed the past events in my head like a visual recording. Did I lead him on or did he lead me on? I only knew that the feeling brought me one of familiarity. Other than a first, guilt doesn't allow me to forget. I know I have the keys to the driver's seat. I should really pick myself up and starting now. On a random note, I have Snow Patrol's Run on my player.

I think its time for another tattoo. Well almost. Other than boy's paw print I haven't really thought of anything else that was deeply meaningful. Perhaps a portrait of my late grandma.

My listening Ear

For the longest time, I told myself that I'd be okay but subsequent events that follow always suggest otherwise. I started to doubt, even what I tell myself. After a heart to heart talk, the type that tests your friendship for better or worst. I finally appreciate its full value and glory. 

There's nothing more I can ask for than a friend who wants to be my listening ear and someone who will be there for me. I'll be ok. 

Golf

Me: I hate the SG dating scene, guys under 29 are deliberately trying to siam relationships. When they hit 30, they scramble to get married. It’s not fair. I mean what is the rationale behind this and where do I stand amongst this nonsense?

WL: Well to them its like, why play 1 hole golf when you can play 18 holes.

I felt kinda fucked up after this. I feel quite jaded with the whole affair. What happened to loyalties? I don’t want to be part of the 18 hole game.

The topic of marriage came up during lunchtime conversation today. Nat asked if I wanted to settle down. I don't want to say I want get married because its not what I want, I want to find someone who was worth settling down for. It sounds like a more logical sequence this way. 

In conversation

jar0n - * says: u saw sparks?
jar0n - * says: hmm?
I say: coldplay song
jar0n - * says: cheeeey
jar0n - * says: haah
I say: heh
I say: i'm dreading valentine's day
jar0n - * says: you dont say..

(On wearing the birthday pressie Jan gave)
I say: yah i'm going to wear that pretty thing tmr
I say: with my date with weilin and his friend
Sha says: whhooohh!!!
Sha says: double date>
I say: no
I say: its more like 3-some
I say: MFF
Sha says: whipidodahdeh

Wow.

2008 - a girl and her pussay 

This pic is so old that looking at it kinda makes me want to tear. I was probably 10-12 years old then. Boy looks huge in my arms. Yup its the same cat. Been more than a decade since, how can I not feel nostalgic; its a piece of my history.

A CNY autopsy

Dear Nainai, 

It's the 2nd year that you haven't been with us. It hasn't been the same. Nobody bothers to open the chilli packets during the reunion dinner because I'm too lazy. At least in the past we both took chilli. Auntie Kim buys fish from the supermarket. I know. WTH. I suspect she finds wet markets too unsanitary. 

I've inherited your jade earrings because the aunties think they're too obiang to wear. I'm still not seeing anyone exclusively. I'm glad I'm still single, at least I didn't chose wrongly. The aunties also told me that we share the same blood group. That's kinda cool. I also wish I inherited your lady luck in striking lottery. I don't donate money to Singapore Pools so I reckon I'll never really know for sure. Perhaps for the big draw.   

The children grow up so fast. We had the noisiest CNY this year, it'll only get worst until all of them hit a pubescent age. I think I'm getting a little too old for this, in fact, I feel old. 

We miss you much. At least I do. 

Love, 

Your favourite granddaughter

Reminscent

In my little emo moments. I think the lyrics say it all. Alanis Morrisette started out fantastic when she first broke out. Angsty women music were kinda big then and she had a great run. I really feel for herlah, her ex-fiance, Ryan Renolds went on to marry ScarletJo who looks like the poster girl for an anatomically perfect woman. She's kinda classier now too. I'd think it'd be so easy to slam them in a song.

I remember Sha telling me that there should be a line to segregate the lines between bestfriend and boyfriend. Was telling Jude how the quality of my conversations now has improved thanks to a certain person who has chosen to "play a role in my life."

CB FUCK!!!!!

!begin rant 

Who the fuck teach you lit review can omit reference one?! Am I supposed to telepathically know where your sources come from or search it out myself? Bladdy hell!!!!

Barry Manilow's rendition of Right Here Waiting sucks ass. Don't mess with the original! 

I heard Susanna and the Magical Orchestra's cover of Love Will Tear Us Apart on Fel's blog (Got to hand it to her for her great taste in music) It sounded so pretty. Then I heard Fall Out Boy's cover and the original. *cringe* It's like they took her Chanel dresses and recorded music out of shredding them to pieces. 

I need a new man whore. I have very short attention spans. Past applicants will not be considered. New ones will go through very stringent screening. Impress me with your best pole dance moves or if you can pick up my drinks tab without bankrupting yourself first. Mingers may not apply. 

!end rant

Stuff that went through my head within the past 30 hours

I'm too nice for my own good. I told myself that I'd stop caring but I ended up recommending him for a job. Hearing his voice again. I felt something. The same feeling when I would overhear his voice over J's phone when he calls sometimes. This is sad and masochistic. I end up falling over and over again. The vortex of insanity - It has a tagline. It sucks. People caught in it are called suckers. Chocolate cake makes me happy. Yes indeed but greed is not good. There is such a thing called too much of a good thing. Sub the latest Soul Eater Episodes already MOFOs! Tossed and turned, couldn't sleep well. I wonder if he noticed. I want a holiday. I think i deserve one. It occurred to me this time two years ago, he proposed. Why am I still thinking of him. I am not in love. Not out. Still getting lucky, that's what is most importante. You might be really happy with what you're doing until someone tells you you're not. Then life begins to suck. And you realise that, its all about the money. Densha okoto was nice. Escapism and hyperreality. I love happy endings.  Secret santa headache. 

Cynical me

I'll always love you - what rubbish. Wait till I tell you Santa doesn't exist. Bwahahahahaha